At the intersection of two fields of inquiry that are highly imaginative and seek real change—the study of human-plant relations and the even less charted study of queer procreation—this article explores queer ways of procreating that humans may learn from plants. In particular, stolon (runner) formation and grafting are considered here because they are vegetal forms of procreation that are not rooted in sexual difference and create collective life forms that are based on dividuality rather than individuality. Both characteristics are mobilized for a queer imagination. Analyzing two plays by Heinrich von Kleist—the comedy Amphitryon (1807) and the tragedy Penthesilea (1808)—the article argues that Amphitryon’s servant, Sosias, multiplies by way of stolons and that the Amazons in Penthesilea are grafted creatures with an ongoing desire to form new grafts. The analysis draws on Gilles Deleuze’s theory of masochism to shift attention away from genital intercourse while sexualizing what in biology is called asexual.